How to Develop Resilience in Yourself? 5 Simple Steps You Must Follow

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Learning how to develop resilience requires you to be patient and present in life. Resilience means to bounce back from the challenges life throws at you. It isn’t less than any superpower.

We all face difficult times. Life has its ways of testing every one. But, not everyone is built strong enough to get back up and embrace those challenges. Sometimes these difficult times break you so much that you surrender to the circumstances. You choose to dwell in it and refuse to move on in life. This is why resilience is a significant life skill to have. 

Resilience is your ability to bounce back from challenging situations. It is a crucial trait that lets you overcome difficulties and emerge stronger than before. Resilience is not something that you’re born with, it is a skill that you can develop over time.

Resilience gives you the emotional and psychological power to cope with stress and hardships in life. It is like a mental reservoir of strength that pushes you to continue moving forward even in hard times, especially when you know things are not in your control. 

In this article, you learn how to develop resilience in yourself. It will show you the importance of building this life-saving skill that teaches you to endure the hardships in life and keep your head high as you move forward. 


How to Develop Resilience in Yourself? 5 Simple Steps you Must Follow

Life is not a smooth ride. Everyone tastes its difficult side and everyone deals with it in a different way. But, your method of dealing with these adversities shows whether you’re resilient or not. 


What is resilience? 

In simple words, resilience is how fast you bounce back and go ahead with your normal life after something stressful and tragic has happened to you,

Psychologists believe that people with resilient character are able to handle the worst of circumstances and rebuild their lives, even after struggling for a period of time. They are more practical in life. The science of resilience shows how these people have a proactive approach towards life. 

Resilience empowers you. It is your capacity to recover from difficult and uncertain life events. People who are resilient don’t fight unwantedly. They understand and accept the reality of the situation. They adapt to it and move forward in life. 


Why is resilience important? 

Resilience is one of the most important traits of your personality. It gives you the strength to endure and overcome hardships in life. It allows you to give yourself the time you need to process the situation, understand it, accept it, and move on from it. 

If you lack resilience, you might easily feel overwhelmed. Even the slightest of problems might trouble you extensively. This is why when things go odd some people turn to unhealthy coping mechanisms, like alcohol or drugs.  

When you are resilient, you are able to tap into your strengths and support systems to look beyond the present challenges and work towards solving the problems patiently. Hence, it is imperative for you to learn how to develop resilience, build a strong character, and have a persistent perspective toward life. 

Here are 6 reasons why should learn to develop resilience in yourself:   

  • It lets you accept and embrace change in life
  • It lets you believe that whatever happens, happens for the best
  • It lets you turn your failures into success with time and patience 
  • It lets you understand that you are the sole controller of your life 
  • It lets you stop limiting yourself and break free from the mindset barrier 
  • It lets you build positive beliefs as you cross navigate the tough times in life  

Resilience fuels you with positivity and strength to get face-to-face with life. It makes you accept the challenges and show yourself what you are capable of. Because, believe me when I say this, most of the time it is not other people’s confidence in us that matters, it is our self-belief and how we see ourselves that creates all the difference. 


How to develop resilience in yourself? 

True resilience is shown when you go through tough times in life. For example: losing a job, failing exams, losing a loved one, etc. All these setbacks are part of life. But, not everyone is built with the inner strength to overcome these difficult times. 

how to develop resilience

This is why it becomes important to learn how to develop resilience in yourself. Because even when you have the strongest emotional support and people to rely on, the very first person to save you in life will always be yourself, your mindset

So, let’s understand what are the 5 ways to build resilience in yourself that will help you to cultivate a strong and healthy attitude towards life: 


1. Focus on the Positive

During difficult times, your negative self talk, thoughts, and emotions can take over your sense of understanding. But, this cannot mean that you let them overpower yourself and side track the good things in life. It makes it even more important to focus on the positive aspects of the situation. 

Yes, this is easier said than done. But you cannot give up and surrender to adversity just because you think this is the worst that could happen. As a woke person, you must look for the silver lining, and try to find something good that can come out of the experience. This will help you to maintain a positive outlook and keep you motivated to move forward.


2. Practice Self Care

Self care is essential for building resilience. But, it is also personal and subjective. You cannot do something for yourself because everyone else is doing it. Thus, it is important to find unique ways to build a healthy relationship with yourself. 

You should take care of your physical, emotional, and mental health. This includes getting enough sleep, eating a healthy diet, exercising regularly, and practicing relaxation techniques such as meditation or deep breathing exercises. When you take care of yourself, you’re better equipped to handle challenging situations that await you. 


3. Have a Support System

Having a support system is the root of developing your resilience. You cannot afford to have people who sugarcoat things for you. It is important to surround yourself with people who keep you in touch with reality but also uplift and encourage you. 

If you’re having a hard time dealing with some things in life, it is imperative to seek support. This support can be both professional or personal, depending on who you confide it. Reach out to your trustworthy people. Talking about your feelings and emotions can help you process them and move forward in life without holding on to any grudges


4. Set Realistic Goals

Setting realistic goals helps you to build resilience because when they are achieved, they give you a sense of self confidence. They boost your self esteem and empower your self belief. Your goals should scare you but they must also fill you with enthusiasm to work towards them.  

The right approach is to break your goals into small, achievable tasks, and work on them one at a time. As you move ahead, do celebrate your progress along the way, and don’t be too hard on yourself if you experience setbacks. Remember that setbacks are a natural part of the process, and they are important to help you learn. Your job is to be consistent with your efforts. 

[Read more: How to be more Consistent: 15 Proven Steps to Master Consistency]


5. Embrace Change

Change is inevitable, it is the only constant in life. Irrespective of how hard you try to hold onto things or people in life, they will change and evolve. That’s the number one rule of nature. Thus, accepting change and learning to embrace it can help you to develop resilience. 

Instead of resisting change, you should try to see it as an opportunity for growth and learning. When you’re open to new experiences, you aren’t afraid to step out of your comfort zone. You learn to take on challenges headstrong in life. When you embrace change, you’re better equipped to adapt to new situations and challenges.


How to develop resilience at work?

An average human spends as much as 90,000 hours at work. This means that a huge portion of your life is spent at your workplace. Thus, as much as it is important to be resilient in life, it is equally important to learn how to develop resilience at work. 

In today’s fast-paced and demanding work environment, building resilience at work can help you to maintain your mental and emotional well-being, overcome challenges, and achieve your professional goals in life. 

Hence, along with the 5 ways to build resilience mentioned above, here are 2 more that will help you to cultivate resilience at your workplace: 


1. Develop a Growth Mindset

Having a growth mindset is all about self belief. It is your faith in yourself that your abilities can be developed through dedication and hard work. People with a growth mindset are more likely to persevere through adverse situations, take on new challenges, and overcome obstacles at work. With a growth mindset, you can become resilient to stand against problems, solve them and improve your overall performance at work. 

[Read more: What is a Growth mindset? 15 Ways to Build a Growth Mindset]


2. Build Strong Professional Relationships

Cultivating strong professional relationships is an important factor in building resilience at work. This helps you to develop & build strong teams and position yourself as a leader. When you connect with your colleagues beyond the superficial “work talk” and take the initiative to build a supportive network, you are seen as a real human instead of a paycheck machine. This strengthens your positive relationships with your coworkers. 


How to develop resilience in your loved ones? 

Resilience is not a trampoline. It is not that you are down one moment and up and normal the next. Being resilient is more like climbing a mountain, without a map to follow. It takes time, strength, and a whole lot of patience with yourself. 

So while you help your loved ones to develop resilience, you must know that it won’t be easy to see them struggle. They will experience setbacks too. It won’t happen overnight. Thus, it is important for you to be their pillar of support and help them cultivate this skill, bit by bit every day. 

how to develop resilience

Hence, here’s how to develop resilience in the people you love: 

1. Help them reframe their thoughts: Help them to train their mind to see the positive side of difficult times. Not in a toxic way that glorifies the adversities and asks them to ‘cheer up’, but in a genuinely caring way.  

2. Show your support: Let them know you’re their for them and they aren’t alone. Irrespective of how much they resist it, they don’t have to be the “I got it” person all the time. Show them you can help them when they need it. 

3. Let them focus on what they can control: Because you want to support them, you don’t have to hover around them all the time. There is a very thin line between helping and being nosy. Give them the time and space they need to deal with the problem. 

4. Help them to manage their stress: Managing your stress can be different for different people. As a guide or supporter, you must help to manage their stress in their own way, ways that are practical and don’t invoke self-harm. 


How do you know someone is resilient? 5 Characteristics of a resilient person 

As difficult it is to develop resilience in yourself, it is quite easy to track the traits of a resilience person. Their personality and aura speak of it before they arrive in the room. People’s experiences with them will tell you so much about their mindset. 

Thus, here are 5 characteristics of a resilient person that cannot go unnoticed:  

  • People with resilience don’t see life as a bed of roses. They don’t see life through some pretty colored lenses. Being resilient, they understand that setbacks and hardships are a part of life. They accept that this is how life happens. Most importantly, they have come to terms with the reality of life by cultivating self belief. 


  • A person with resilience never has the “Oh, god! Why me” attitude. They know that when life doesn’t work how they want, this simply means that life is trying to teach them something. Their past experiences have taught them enough to analyze the different situations in life and act according to them.  


  • After facing failures, people with resilience don’t sit with their shattered will. They get upset about it, they may cry but they don’t attach their self-worth to one bad experience. They know that failure is always a stepping stone that brings you closer to the next best thing in life. 


  • People with resilience radiate self-confidence. They make realistic plans and abide by them. They have good communication skills, they manage their emotions effectively and most importantly, they don’t victimize themselves. 


  • Resilient people are good with their problem solving and decision making skills. Their ability to think critically makes them handle the situations in a logical manner. They don’t dwell and sit around cursing the problem, they are present in the moment to learn how they can get out of it.


Resilience is an extremely powerful trait to possess. You learn how to develop resilience as you grow with time and situations. Building resilience is both effective and essential as it allows you to face the worst in life. It allows you to marshal the strength to not just survive but thrive and prosper through the most difficult times in life. 

Building resilience takes time and effort, but it’s a skill that benefits you throughout your life. By following everything that’s mentioned here, taking it at your pace, and learning from your and others’ experiences, you can develop the resilience you need to overcome any challenge that comes your way.

Resilience is not built overnight. It takes failures and setbacks to build it. Because the truth about life is that it is not going to be easy. It will take you to the high road when you least expect it. And, it will surprise you when you are least ready for it.

This is exactly what the fun of being alive is. You fall, you rise. And as much as rising high is in your hands, falling in life is also the result of your deeds. 

So, take life as it comes. Continue to work on your mindset and soar higher in your own way. 

Until next time, 

I’ll see you soon!