Building a business while being a wife is not an easy thing. And I am finally learning it after being a wife myself. In this blog, I am sharing my experience of juggling both my work and my marriage responsibilities. If you’re in the same boat as I am, I hope you not only resonate with my story but also find it in you to manage both these roles at your own pace just as I am doing.
First thing first, with this blog I am not aiming to wear the batch of burnout as an honor.
As a woman, especially if you’re a working wife, you have so many roles to play, and so many shoes to fit into.
Also, the people and the society around you expect you to fit in all these shoes effortlessly, without complaining.
But the truth is, every shoe you wear has a different level of comfort.
Some give you shoe bites while some fit as if they were made for you. Some look mesmerizing on the outside and hurt badly inside while some are plain and simple, loaded with the comfort of a cushion.
But, despite the comfort level, you continue to walk in those shoes. You may take a break if you want, and you may rest if at all but you cannot stop, at least not when you’re newly married.
So, come along as I share my story of building a business as a newly married wife living with my in-laws, trying my best to balance both my work and my personal life.
Building a Business as a Newly Married Indian Woman: 5 Things I Do That Can Help You Too
If you have read my love story in my previous blog, you would already know that I recently got married to the love of my life.
While marriage is seen as “the perfect ending” to a love story, the truth it is only the beginning of the next chapter of your life. Like anyone in love, I was super excited about marrying the man I had loved for over a decade.
The wedding ceremonies happened for 3 days and it was a memorable experience all together.
While I was mentally prepared to leave my home and start my new life with my partner, the realization and the actual truth of living that part has been a difficult time for me.
I am the eldest child in the family. I was brought up with a lot of love and care. I was the most pampered child. I knew nothing about the daily chores until a year before the wedding.
So, when I came to my partner’s home after the wedding ceremonies, I was mentally prepared to learn them and get out of my comfort zone on a personal level.
And, I did that too.
But, let’s be honest, adjusting to a completely new environment while building a business isn’t a cakewalk.
No matter how hard you try, things don’t always go your way.
The constant overload of information from work and house chores started affecting my productivity and the level of service delivery as a freelance writer.
And I realized it when I missed a client call because I was busy preparing dinner. It wasn’t anybody’s fault but mine.
I missed the call and had to apologize to the client, but thankfully, because we have been working together for a long time now, she was supportive and understood my situation.
However, I knew I could not continue like this.
So, here are a few I did that have been helping me in building a business and getting my foot back in the game as a content creator and service provider.
Building a Business as a Newly Married Indian Woman
1. My Husband Being Open and Honest About My Work With His Family Members
Let’s be honest, society has always portrayed in-laws in a negative light. Most of the stories I heard before getting married only scared me thinking about my future.
Ever since “the marriage talk” began, I was concerned about not losing my work and career under the burden of being the ‘perfect’ wife and daughter-in-law.
Now that I am in those shoes, I see every day that more than me it is my husband who makes sure that I give at least 4-5 hours to my work every day.
Of course, we have occasions to attend to and family duties to fulfill. But, as a work-from-home wife, I make sure that my personal commitments don’t overpower my professional commitments.
This is something I have been doing since the start of my writing career in 2020, so it wasn’t new to me.
However, having a working daughter-in-law was definitely a new thing for my in-laws. And as much as I am adjusting to being with them, they are putting equal (maybe more) effort into making things easy for me.
Right from the beginning, my partner made sure that I was aware of my in-law’s nature and lifestyle and they knew that of me. This made it easy for all of us to find a meeting point to work things out despite the generation gap and the background difference.
2. Spending Time With My Mother-in-law
Indian television series has really spoiled a mother-in-law’s image. For years, they have portrayed her as this evil human who only wants to suck her daughter-in-law’s blood and make her life miserable.
This is the perception of a mother-in-law that most people talk of, at least in India it is.
But, but I thank my stars that I was destined to be here, with this new family.
Ever since my husband revealed about our relationship to his family, he openly told them about my work and my lifestyle.
This simple practice has made it easy for all of us to build bridges and fill those gaps of assumptions with real thoughts and ideas.
My mother-in-law has been kind and sensible enough to understand the importance of my work in my life. At the same time, she has been patient enough to teach me all the chores on a daily basis.
In fact, apart from my partner, if there is anybody in this new family trying to help me adjust and ease things out, that’s my mother-in-law.
She helps me block time for my work hours (I’ll talk about this below) while managing the house chores.
She has been a huge pillar of support all through this time.
While this mother-daughter equation is a new thing for both of us, I follow this one simple philosophy or rule with my in-laws.
So, I have a younger brother, who will get married at some point in life. My philosophy is simple, “If I wouldn’t want my sister-in-law to do something with my parents, I will not do it with my in-laws.”
These simple things add a lot of perspective to a lot of situations and help me stay calm even during those rough in-law conversations.
But as they say, “You only clap with two hands”. If I have been constantly raising my hand seeking that support and encouragement from my new family, my “mother-in-law” has been the first one to raise hers and show it to me.
So, if you’re a married woman trying hard to do it, here’s some advice: Build a connection with your mother-in-law, I cannot guarantee it will solve all your problems, but at least you will have a shoulder to lean on.
3. Blocking Out Work Hours
Living in a joint family as a work-from-home woman can really blur the lines between your professional and personal time.
Not that this was a new thing for me. I used to go through this before marriage as well.
The difference is I could at least say it out loud or even scold the people around me when it affected my work commitments.
But, I cannot do the same thing with my in-laws, especially since it’s just been a few weeks of being married and moving in with them.
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So, my husband and I came up with this one solution that made the most sense and helped everyone: blocking out my work hours.
Every day I try my best to complete my chores maximum by 1 pm so that I have the next 5-6 hours to dedicate to my business.
This simple time management between the house chores and my business work helps me to live in the moment and focus on the task at hand.
Yes, there are days in exception when I completely let go of one of these to focus on the other based on the priority of the situation.
However, most days I manage to follow my schedule and stay in line with my tasks for the day.
Blocking out my work hours every day has really simplified how approach building a business as a married woman.
4. Batch Content Creation For My Social Media
My social media is a huge part of my freelancing business. In fact, it is what my business is all about.
If you’re coming across my content for the first time, I am a freelance writer and marketer and I provide my services to industry experts, thought leaders, coaches, and brands in the wellness space.
My LinkedIn is my primary client acquisition platform.
Then, I have my Instagram and I have started building around client acquisition as well.
Then, I have my Pinterest which I use to promote this blog.
And, lastly, I have my YouTube where I aim to post consistently this year.
Along with my client projects, I also dedicate time to creating content for my social media channels.
Since 90% of this content is in written form, I have started working on these in one go.
If you have followed me since the beginning of my journey, you would know that I rely on my productivity planner a lot.
I am a “write and do it” girl. So, I make sure that every week I dedicate a minimum of 8-10 hours to writing my content. This includes my LinkedIn posts, my Instagram captions, my blog content (just like this one), and my YouTube scripts.
Along with the batch content creation, I also schedule my content. I try to do it at least a week ahead, but if not a week it’s always scheduled 2-3 days in advance.
This simple exercise of batch content creation and scheduling helps me to stay ahead with my social media content and not lose on the consistency I have built on my platforms over the years.
5. Finding My “Me Time” Throughout The Day
The newly married life has its own perks and struggles.
While I am elated to be married to the man I love and work towards building our dream life, it is exhausting sometimes.
As much as I want to focus on my career and invest my time in building a business, I equally want to be a happy wife and a happy daughter-in-law.
But, I don’t want to lose myself in this whole process.
I want all of this to be a part of my life and not become my entire life.
I don’t want to spend the rest of my life trying to prove myself to the people around me.
And even though the time I spend with my husband adds to the quality of my life, I cannot lose my personal time amidst all this.
This “me time” doesn’t necessarily mean that I need a luxurious sponge bath or an elaborate skincare routine.
Some days it’s as simple as vibing to my favorite music in the background while I clean and arrange my closet.
Some days it’s watching a movie, some times it’s watching an episode of FRIENDS while having dinner.
Sometimes it’s a deep reading session and sometimes it’s as simple as sitting in front of my laptop and writing an elaborate blog about how I feel.
Yes, writing this blog, and sharing my experiences and feelings with you all, is self-care for me.
Like I said, the bottom line is not to lose myself and keep the wild, free child inside me alive.
The ultimate goal is to not take life too seriously and enjoy it one day at a time doing the things I love with the people who matter.
Conclusion
This brings me to the end of my rant.
If you’re also a newly married woman who came through this post by chance, take this as a sign to invest your time in building a business.
The truth is marriage is not easy.
Some days you will cry yourself to sleep missing your old life and other days you will thank the universe for bringing the other person into your life.
Between both these extreme emotions and all the chaos that a married life can bring, building a business keeps you sane.
It gives you a purpose that is solely yours to create and work towards.
And trust me when I say this, in this day and age, you need this purpose more than anything else as a woman.
Of course, financial independence and a sense of self-security are just added bonuses in the whole dynamics of nurturing your skills and building a business through them.
Finally, if you’re rowing the same boat as me, I hope this post inspires you to choose a skill, go all in, and build your career around it.
For me it’s writing, what’s that skill for you?
How do you want to create your dream life? Feel free to leave your answers in the comments below, I’d love to read them.